Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The men of my past, a la Gilmore Girls

I love love love Gilmore Girls. And if you like good, smart tv, you love Gilmore Girls, too. Sometimes I like to wrap my life up in Gilmore Girls metaphors. Today is one of those times. So I bring you,

My Past Relationships, Gilmore Girls-style.

I really only have two men of my past.

The first, the Dean to my Rory. My high school boyfriend, letter jacket, rose bouquets, serenading at my bedroom window, jewelry, school dances, song dedications on the radio, and all. My practice boyfriend. We were so incompatible, and honestly he kind of annoyed me (and really embarrassed me), but he really, really liked me. He treated me way better than I deserved and he was just so darn puppy-dog loyal. I liked being pampered. He was my Dean. (SPOILER alert! If you are 7 years behind and haven't seen the season finale of season 4 of Gilmore Girls (what is wrong with you?!), read no further... You have been warned!) Except, you know, I didn't sleep with him and break up his marriage and then ditch him for a bunch of trust-fund party boys... So there's that. But anyway, even now, 10+ years later, seeing him and remembering his devotion to me is still good for my self-esteem. Every girl needs a Dean to teach her how she should be treated and to teach her how she should treat someone she eventually finds to love.

That would make boyfriend #2 my Jess. Soulful, poetic, misunderstood Jess, who just kind of floated through life with no goals, plans or direction. Sounds about right. My Jess played me songs he wrote for me on his guitar. We talked books and philosophy and religion. We wrote each other 20-page love letters. He would drive 50 miles on his motorcycle in the rain to come visit me at college, and we would spend all night walking around campus because he had flaked on finding sleeping arrangements for himself... Then he would have some kind of emotional freak-out and he would check out of our relationship. And we couldn't really talk about our issues, because we are both writers, so we would write about our issues. It was a super healthy relationship and not dysfunctional in the least... Oh but I loved him and his tortured soul.

(I'm not going to comment at all on my present (and future) love, because no matter how hard I try I just can't parallel him to Logan Hunztberger. Which is fine, because, while I like Logan, I honestly don't really like who Rory becomes as his other half... And my love certainly isn't a spoiled rich kid.)

The reason I have been thinking about this is that periodically I dream about these boys from my past. Or rather, periodically I dream about one of these boys from my past. Can you guess which one? Which of the two I just can't get out of my subconscious? Yep, the sometimes-depressed romantic who was wrong for me in every way. I try not to be too hard on myself for these dreams, because I can't control them. But it bugs me. It bugs me that he's still there, somewhere. What kind of a person am I? Who admits that they have dreams about their ex?! Someone out there in the interwebz, please tell me I am not the only one (even if you have to lie!), because I am starting to get down on myself about it, and my Easter/Mother's Day supply of binge chocolate will only last so long...!

Or you know, if you can't help a sister out, maybe you have a fictional character-boyfriend parallel you'd like to share. You know I'm dying to hear.

1 comment:

-A said...

I haven't put enough thought into it to have a ready made parallel for my former beaus, but some of them do crop up in my dreams.

It bugs me because I remember so few of my dreams that I automatically feel guilty if I happen to remember one *and* it features an ex-boyfriend. I can feel the annoyance, but definitely think it falls in a no-control zone.

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